Hey DDB fam! I AM BACK!!!
I’ve missed this space! I trust that you are well. I know some of you were wondering when I’d be back; my apologies…I didn’t mean to leave you hanging, and I needed some more time to gather my thoughts!
We are in the month of November, you all! One more month to go, and we say goodbye to 2021! Woah!
The holiday season is usually busy for me, and before you know it, it just speeds by. My goal is to make the best of each day. I have some pressing goals staring me in my face and asking, “What’s up?”
At this moment, I have no response 🤣. I will surely get it together, though.
I’m sure you’re wondering what I was up to during my hiatus. It was actually quite busier than expected. Busy…yet good and productive. As mentioned, my church takes time out to fast and pray every October. It was a time to reconnect, recharge, reflect, and refresh for me. Taking time off from social media really helped me to focus and restructure my priorities. During that time, I was reminded of God’s love and his purpose for my life. God is so good! 🙌
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Now, let’s talk about staying off of social media 🥴. To be honest, it was tough at first. After publishing my last Instagram post, I wanted to go back to add something, but I had to restrain myself. I also had to log out of my Instagram accounts on multiple devices (my laptop, phone, and tablet); I initially only logged out on my phone. However, I have to research some Instagram accounts for work; once I pulled up the account, it’ll bring up my handle. I didn’t realize it until after the first few times. So I had to do the needful to avoid the temptation to stroll through the Instagram streets.
I also deleted the Facebook…or should I say meta app from my phone, but kept it on my tablet because I was part of a private group for a conference (more on this coming soon), and I needed to stay informed. I’d check out the group a few times a week. One of the first times I checked, I forgot and ended up commenting on a picture of one of my favorite blog supporters (hey girl!) I felt so bad; I felt like a liar 🤣. I quickly checked the group for updates about the conference and exited the building.
The social media platforms that I could not do away with were Whatsapp and Telegram because of work/ministry obligations. Whatsapp and I have a love-hate relationship! It is a necessity, but it is so needy…so demanding…urgh! Every day I wake up to tons of messages, and it can be overwhelming. Eventually, I had to set boundaries… now, I check and respond to messages when I’m available…I refuse to be under any pressure to click that little green and white icon. And when I need to focus, I take off notifications for a few hours. It’s so liberating!!! 💃💃💃 Telegram is cool, I don’t have too much going on there, so it is easier to exit the app when I am done with my tasks for the day.
Some people were holding me accountable, though! One day, I was chatting with a former mentee on Whatsapp, and she replied to my message with the following statement “I thought you were on a social media break”... Those sounded like fighting words to me; I felt attacked! Haha…just kidding. I explained to her why I was still on Whatsapp. My conversation with her taught me something…the power of authenticity. In this day and age, people want to be associated with the real ones. It has been said so many times in so many ways; social media often portrays pseudo perfection. There is always the pressure to be picture-perfect; almost everything is filtered to reflect only what people want you to see.
If we are not careful, social media can actually impact us negatively. Instead of focusing on who you were created to be, there is a high temptation to compare yourself to what you see. My break from social media was it for me. It helped me to focus on what really matters. I had more time for my husband, family, other duties, and, more importantly, myself. It was breathtaking to be alone with my thoughts. Minding what I was pondering on and intentionally thinking on my truth…which is what God has said concerning me. In the past, Instagram had me feeling like an addict; at one point, I would open the app with the intention to chill for a little bit and find myself scrolling through pictures, watching videos, and reading content for an extended time.
I have now put a structure in place to ensure that history does not repeat itself. Unless it is for work or ministry, my time on social media is limited to a certain amount of daily hours. I have a setting on my phone that keeps track of my time on certain apps! Being off of social media was very productive… I read a book during my break and took some courses; I want to keep the same energy as we round up 2021.
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After logging back onto Instagram, the worse happened! I found out that two people had died, and it hurt me so bad. One was a child and another a middle-aged pastor. It makes me so sad when I hear that a child is either terminally ill or they pass on; I also hate when people die young…it rubs me the wrong way!
Losing a loved one is so hard; I lost three loved ones this year, and grieving is not fun at all! I agree that people are entitled to grieve the way they desire, but I also know that believers ought to grieve differently.
And regarding the question, friends, that has come up about what happens to those already dead and buried, we don’t want you in the dark any longer. First off, you must not carry on over them like people who have nothing to look forward to, as if the grave were the last word. Since Jesus died and broke loose from the grave, God will most certainly bring back to life those who died in Jesus.
1 Thessalonians 4:13
PSA: GOD IS NOT A MURDER!!!
Many people have misinterpreted scriptures or erroneously assume that God kills people or inflicts them with diseases. God is the giver of life; he loves the entire world so much, that is why he sent his only son to die and save us from sin (which invited death on the scene) and its consequences (sicknesses, poverty, etc.). I understand that it is painful to lose a loved one, especially after praying for a miracle…I’ve been there! God is not at fault; it is the devil who kills, steals, and destroys. There is so much that goes on behind the scenes that often leaves us with more questions than answers. No matter what, God is good, and he will be right there in the midst of it all, to comfort and strengthen you.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the LORD your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior; I give Egypt for your ransom, Cush and Seba in your stead.
Isaiah 43:2-3 NIV
I pray that anyone reading this and is hurting will be comforted! *virtual hugs*
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Have you ever lost a loved one and found yourself angry at God? How did you get through it?
Have you ever taken a social media break?!?! If so, how was it?
Do you feel like social media takes up a significant amount of your time?
Fam, I want to hear from you in the comment section, don’t leave without saying hi!
Hold up!!! Before, I let you go…I attended the Women Evolve 2021, hosted by Sarah Jakes Roberts. Oh my goodness, it was so good!!! I will tell you about it in my next post!!!
With lots of love,
– Bunmi Adebiyi
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