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In my last post, I spoke about how I lost my job while five months pregnant with my third child. At that time it was a devastating experience for me. I had many concerns and more questions than answers. Continue reading to see how I handled things after being walked out of the office building.
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After I got home that day, my emotions were all over the place. I was angry, thankful, sad, confused, relieved, and hurt at the same time! I couldn’t believe that it actually happened! I was a hard worker, and I gave that job my best even in the midst of the drama. I had questions; I asked God in my heart, “How?” “Why” “What next?”. The Holy Spirit kept whispering to me to “Rest!” Deep within me; I knew that everything would be okay; I just did not know how or when.
I carried the box filled with my stuff from work: items from my desk, snacks, etc., out of the car and just dumped it on my living room floor. I wanted to lay down and take a nap, but my mind kept replaying incidences from the past few months. I kept thinking about how I should have said or done things differently. I did not like the feeling of failure!
The Holy Spirit kept whispering to me to “Rest!” I finally decided to oblige, but I realized that the keys to my car were nowhere to be found. There I was again, getting myself worked up and stressed out; I searched everywhere! I just drove the car into the garage a few minutes prior, and I did not lock the car; I could still open the doors, so the keys had to be somewhere. After my futile search, I had no choice but to lay down because I was tired. I proceeded to call the doctor’s office and cancel my appointment; that was the day when I was supposed to find out the baby’s sex.
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Rewind to April when I started to dislike my job, I did not know it then, but God was trying to get my attention. Maybe that random call with a job offer from someone I had not spoken to in months was God’s provision. I prayed when I received the offer, but to be honest, I was in my feelings; I was not sensitive. My relationship with God was not the best. I had let the busyness of my responsibilities overwhelm me and felt like God understood my neglect. I did not prioritize fellowship with my father, yet I was busy with “his work” ...to my fellow young ministers, please don’t fall into this trap!
Around that same time, my spiritual father called me out of the blue and told me to focus on studying God’s Word in that season as he shared other things that God had laid on his heart. I could pray without thinking twice, but I really struggled with the thorough study of the Word. The Word of God is essential, when we give attention to it there are things we will enter into without having to pray about them. God’s Word is our life line, it renews, it restores, it heals, it delivers, and it transforms.
I needed to do some restructuring; everything was just a cycle; I was going with the flow instead of initiating the flow. My father was seriously trying to get my attention; he wanted to prepare me for the next season and give me some deep secrets. But I was not available! I am sure you can relate! If this is you right now, please stop and run back to the father; his arms are opened wide!
When I was experiencing the drama at work, I was distracted. I started focusing on the person (my supervisor) instead of the purpose embedded in the situation. As a child of God, things do not come against you to destroy you; they come to propel you and elevate you.
James 1:2-4 MSG
Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.
When I informed my spiritual father about all the work stress, he emphasized showcasing God’s love towards my supervisor, honoring her as my boss, and doing an excellent job. I could not afford to stay angry with my boss; I was protective of the atmosphere around me. When I received harsh emails or negative feedback. I’d pop my earphones in and blast a message or gospel music. I needed to stay sane, and I needed to protect my mind.
One day God told me, “The way people treat you is not a reflection of you; it is a reflection of them.” You can not control how anyone treats you; you can control how you respond. You can choose to be bitter or be the better person and see things from a different perspective. My supervisor was going through personal struggles. She mentioned that her mom was sick, she also had some complications during her pregnancy, and she probably had other challenges that she could not mention. Her actions were reactions to the discomfort and uncertainties; she needed love and peace, so I prayed for her even when it did not feel good. Someone once said “The greatest expression of love is intercession.”
It was time for me to move on, but I was stuck on pause. As my belly grew bigger, I figured that I’d settle. There were no other job leads, and I doubted that anyone would want to hire a heavily pregnant woman. I made up my mind to endure the job and waddle my way until delivery and then maternal leave (I would still be getting some income). I planned to have a new job before my maternity leave was over. But my God had a more fantastic plan!
Jeremiah 29:11 MSG
I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.
Before starting that job, I had another job offer with higher pay, but God told me to take the lower-paying one; he said he was sending me there on assignment. Now, it was time for another assignment; I had to move or be moved. My father turned the situation around in my favor. I had to be reminded of my life’s mission to fulfill my God-ordained purpose; purpose involves work; it is more than a job.
The end of that job began a fantastic phase of my life. What a journey it has been! WE MOVE!
To be continued…
With lots of love,
– Bunmi Adebiyi
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